Sample voice check: the Tally autumn newsletter
A fictional result of the Brand voice check recipe: each line that breaks a rule, the rule it breaks with a citation, a rewrite, and what already works.
Verdict
Close. One claim breaks a rule and has to change before sending; two lines drift from the voice. The rest sounds like Tally.
Lines to change
| Line in the draft | Rule | Rewrite |
|---|---|---|
| “Never chase a late payment again.” | Claims · No absolute promises: reminders reduce chasing, they don't end it | “Let Tally do the chasing.” |
| “We're super excited to announce…” | Voice · Say what it does, not how we feel | “Your clients can now pay in parts.” |
| “leverage partial payments” | Vocabulary · Say: use, take. Avoid: leverage | “take part payments” |
Already working
- Opens with the freelancer's problem, not the feature (Voice · Start with them).
- Prices are written in full, with tax stated (Claims · Money is exact).
- One call to action, at the end.