# Sample voice check: the Tally autumn newsletter

A fictional result of the Brand voice check recipe: each line that breaks a rule, the rule it breaks with a citation, a rewrite, and what already works.

> [!info]
> **Fictional example.** Tally and its brand rules are invented. This shows the shape of what the *Brand voice check* recipe produces against a team's own brief.

## Verdict

Close. One claim breaks a rule and has to change before sending; two lines drift from the voice. The rest sounds like Tally.

## Lines to change

| Line in the draft | Rule | Rewrite |
| --- | --- | --- |
| “Never chase a late payment again.” | Claims · No absolute promises: reminders reduce chasing, they don't end it | “Let Tally do the chasing.” |
| “We're super excited to announce…” | Voice · Say what it does, not how we feel | “Your clients can now pay in parts.” |
| “leverage partial payments” | Vocabulary · Say: use, take. Avoid: leverage | “take part payments” |

## Already working

- Opens with the freelancer's problem, not the feature (Voice · Start with them).
- Prices are written in full, with tax stated (Claims · Money is exact).
- One call to action, at the end.